By Raymi's ass!Jesus Christ and all the Dwarves in Disneyland, that thing is just spectacular. It takes my breath away every time I see it. It speaks to me in a secret language that only I can understand. It says things to me. It lets me know what it wants, what it needs, in ways that the English language is simply inadequate. You know that something is special when communication transcends language, which is why it's so rare.
Although I've never met Raymi (who is considerably younger than I am), I think her marvellous, marvellous dumper instinctively knows the almost spiritual experience that my mighty. mighty rimjobs bring to everyone that experiences them. There aren't a lot of things that I'm famous for - God knows that that hot girls are endlessly bored by my political pontifications - but when I finally have the good sense to die, I hope that I'm remember for all of the mystical feelings that my mouth has given the women in my life.
It seems only proper that they would go forth and tell the villagers about my gift until it becomes the legend it properly deserves to be. The menfolk that I leave behind should be inspired by my example and learn to slurp on their lady's naughty bits until it changes the way she views life. If my time on this mortal plain has served any purpose at all, I hope that would be it. And Raymi's perfect posterior has a lot to do with that.
I've strived to always avoid being spiritual in public, but things like Miss White's delicate ring piece make that impossible. And you know what? It should! How tragically empty would life be if we simply survived from day to day, never knowing that there was something better out there for each of us? Yes, we make it through the day, but to what end? Why?
As an atheist, Easter has always been a difficult time for me, a sad and tragic period that deprives me of the sense of redemption so freely bestowed upon my theist friends. But this year, I have found something to celebrate, something greater and more powerful than I will ever be. There is nothing false about the idol I worship, oh no! All of life's beauty is contained within it, and few things inspire me to truly evangelize the way it does. Sure, human resurrection is impressive, but let's not get carried away with ourselves.
Mine eyes have seen the glory of Raymi's beautiful butt cheeks and I would freely die for their sins, both real and imagined. After all, how could I not? Just take a gander at how they look in those shorts! That video is nothing short of a revelation, and I hope that you all gather your families around this weekend and see the majesty in it. It might just bring us all closer together as a great family of man and it'll probably be the holiest you do over the holiday.
in the fade from raymi lauren on Vimeo.
Christ, I'm adorable. Is it any wonder that I'm an internationally renowned Lothario?
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