Nadya Suleman Is Going To Make It After All!

If you look like Angelina Jolie after an unfortunate accident, have nice big tits and can't pay the bills because squirting out babies if your hobby, shooting porn seems like a perfectly natural decision to make. As a matter of fact, I think you should probably consider pornography as a career even if you only just have the nice big tits. Who am I kidding? You should do porn if you have little knockers, too. I'm too magnanimous to discriminate.

It don't think I'm shocking any of you out there by pointing out that times are tough. The American economy is heading into what I believe is a death spiral and losing one's home isn't exactly uncommon. If you take my reputation as a world-renowned economic forecaster as seriously as you should, you know that every American adult will be hawking a fuck-tape of their own within 18 months.

Having said that, after having fourteen children in a relatively short time (by which I mean the average human lifespan), Nadya Suleman's cooter probably looks as sexually inviting as a hobo's battered old suitcase, something that wouldn't seem out of place in a Steinbeck novel. I'm also assuming that she doesn't give head or take it in the dumper because she's insane. And there's a little voice in the back of my head that keeps telling me that probably doesn't shave, like all the best girls do.

Given the utter disintegration of the human condition, none of those things actually precludes you from entering the wonderful world of professional smut. There's always the fetish market. Did you know that there's no shortage of men who will pay top dollar to see a celebrity look-alike with big cans and a smashed cunt whip a grown man dressed as a baby? Now you do! No need to thank me.

It should go without saying that I'm far too classy to pay good money for something like that. After all, I can download it for free from a torrent site. Besides, I need to save the money for when Octomom starts doing "Crush" porn.

If you ever wondered why I keep blogging after nearly eight years, now you know. I want you to love current events as much as I do!


For more and equally disturbing still photos of Octo's introduction to infantilism, go no further than The Superficial.