"Cars are crashing every night - I drink and drive, everything's in sight"

Yeah, I know. I haven't been writing very much. The fact is that I've been a pretty busy boy of late and I'm bored to fucking death of pretty much everything. You can deal or, y'know, not.

One thing that I have been doing is reviewing comments as they come in, and that remains as educational as always. Sometimes I tend to forget that a great percentage of the population is so goddamned stupid that they face every day with the imminent danger of forgetting to breathe.

I have no idea why, but one of my most popular posts - according to no fewer than three different referrers - is something I threw out there almost exactly a year ago about Motley Crue vocalist Vince Neil's most recent drunk driving arrest.

The post was called "Nikki Sixx is an understanding fellow."I'm not sure why so many folks continue to read it because it isn't blindingly original or particularly well written. And while Vince has a bigger set of tits than most of the starlets and porno whores that I so lovingly chronicle here, they're the result of excess, laziness and stupidity, unlike Lindsay Lohan's. I'm just left to suppose that a good number of blog readers are starfuckers of has-beens, and they'll blow Vince Neil because they can't distinguish the singer of REO Speedwagon from his roadies.

Remember, last year's adventure in Vegas wasn't the former Mr. Wharton's first trip to the DUI rodeo. He actually got hammered behind the wheel and killed the drummer of Hanoi Rocks back in December of 1984. The two people in the car ol' Vince's Pantera plowed into were grievously and permanently injured. For this, he was sentenced to less than month in the county jail, where he got blowjobs from groupies that the Sheriff's Department let into his cell.

Vince Neil killed his friend and crippled two innocent strangers simply because he's an irredeemable fuck-up. And he paid virtually no price for it, other a $2.5 million dollar settlement and a couple of weeks of getting head behind bars. He's still able to freely travel the world, too. I'm not aware of a single country that has barred his entry due to his criminal record. Trust me, you would have an ... interesting experience trying to enter, say, Japan after having killed someone.

So Vince, being Vince, goes on to buy a fucking bar, gets wasted in it, and drives drunk again. That caught my attention, just as I would hope that it catches yours. This guy is a potential slow-motion serial killer.

Given that background - the facts of which are uncontested - I'm nothing less than stunned that I get comments like the one I got this past Monday.

I think you should go fuck yourself, and keep your damn thoughts to yourself. Everyone should, its not like they don't know what you fucking said already. It's not like Neil actually tried to kill the fucking guy. Like common, it was 25 years ago, and you know what shit happens. Find something better to write about, what if it happened to you, and honestly calling the guy pathetic is just un called for. I think your the pathetic one, you could have said this in a much nicer way.

Wow. I would have a hard time believing that you're not as mystified by that comment as I was.

Lookee, I've spent the last sixteen years listening to the world freak the fuck over O.J Simpson, Casey Anthony or both. But both Simpson and Anthony spent years in the hoosegow just awaiting trial, whereas Vince Neil did less than a month after being convicted of actually killing someone and wrecking the bodies of two other people. And then he put himself in the position where he could do it again.

Saying that "It's not like Neil actually tried to kill the fucking guy" only goes to prove that my anonymous friend is either genetically dishonest or a pituitary retard. If a vehicular homicide - what Neil was actually charged with - is intentional, it ceases to be vehicular homicide. Then it's murder. The law actually does make distinctions about these things, you know.

And the fact that it was 25 years ago is meaningless. I trust that my anonymous buddy wouldn't feel the need to excuse O.J if he married another uppity blond or Casey Anthony announced her intention to breed again. Or if Germany started lusting for Polish real-estate again. Of course, I don't know that. It's just a gut instinct of mine. It might well be that my commenter is an utter sociopath. Who can say?

I have an enviable library of rock n' roll fuck-uppery on my bookshelves, and I cherish it the way that most folks cherish their useless fucking children. I love stories of idiot savants destroying everything in their paths, up to and including themselves. If I were to guess, I'd say that I've read hundreds of such books.

However, Vince Neil is in a category all by himself. Most rock assholes only ever really hurt themselves. And they tend to do it in the most entertaining ways. In only the rarest of circumstances does anyone get seriously hurt or dead. Fat, untalented Vince killed one guy and crippled two others when he was 23 years old and could very well have done it again when he was 49.

If my new best friend feels it necessary to excuse that, I hope to God that no one he ever cares about is snuffed by a recidivist drunk driver. Because if the skell happens to belt out an especially jaunty version of "Too Young to Fall in Love", our pal might have to decide that the lives of his loved ones just weren't worth that much after all.

And, yes, I suppose that there's a "nicer way" for me to have said that, but fuck you. I find myself growing less tolerant of starfucking stupidity as I get older.